Writing and Pain

I write.. just write it out!

I forget the last time started this, but each time I have problem and this injury is killing me, I write my pain to get therapy for myself. I have many dark poem of myself, showing how I try to get up with my pain and move on. It was my first reason of writing my website ‘PrincessKaurvaki’ .

One day, my friend asked me whether most of the poetry is about me or other. I said may be couple of them are about me, or maybe not. She said she was surprised reading all those emotional poetry. People catch me as mature woman, look very strong outside, never complain anything and look like genius girl do anything well. No, I’m liar! I’m the biggest liar ever! You could never believe anything I said and you should not. All things you see about me could be just manipulation I made for you.

Yes, I have to say, I'm person who don't like showing my weakness and pain. I feel like they should not see my pain or my sad face. I couldn't hide it sometimes. It's killing me slowly. My mental is disturbed and I feel like the death man with live body. But still, I'm one who feels not easy to start a conversation and share my problem to other. Don't say I didn't try. I tried, but I just felt all weird and not comfort. For me, it’s never been easy. I have problem in conversation and communication with other. I do speak less.

May be I was made to be like this. May be I just have to write it out.. into a diary, into a poetry, to finally read my pain into an art and taste those pains again, but feel better because I have been higher person for myself. It’s not that I’m a good writer. I’m just the amateur one, who trying to relieve the pain and feel better when write it out.

I'm still sitting here.. with the darkness around me. It's still my best friend. It still accompanies me and waits for another poetry wrote by me. I feel empty, there's a hole inside my heart. But the ink and paper come closer to me to whisper: 

'Don't be worry, don't be sad, and don’t be mad. I'm here to be with you, be your slave, listen to you and be all you need. Just close your eyes, and I’ll be here for you, right the second you wish. We'll spread our power into your soul and at the sudden you have strength. You just have to write it out.. and you have our strength. Don’t be worry, don’t be sad. You have future in the palm of your hand. And very soon, you’re no longer feeling alone and empty'.

..........................................................

Ohh... it's 5 am.

I'm awake.. It was a dream! What was I talking about??

 Photo Credit: mockeryoflove.wordpress(.)com

Lucky You are Healthy!

As the saying goes, Health is Wealth. For person who stay in hospital and doctor judge them for cancer, live is seems hard to be enjoyed. You will forget how the delicious of hamburger is, forget how exciting to drive your favorite luxurious car or how the newest Jelly Bean makes you proud. When you are sick, you don't care anymore with royalty –want to try it?.

Not Easy to Understand..

But, it's not easy to understand by people in healthy condition. We are easily jealous on each other with those who show off their royalty. We are easily jealous for those fancy things. And we are thinking to have them is much more important that have a healthy body. No, I guarantee, it’s wrong. Healthy body is important and it's blessed from God that we couldn't count on. More than those fancy things? Absolutely YES!

The Fact is…

When you are healthy, you can do things you want to do. You have hug chances to eat anything and go anywhere you want to. Healthy body allows you to do everything best in your life: play, fight for your dream, exercise, walk around, play, jump, watching cinema till night, dance, dating your girl and do many things.

“Oh… She is Very Lucky!”

When you say to yourself, "Oh, she is lucky. She has rich father, she doesn't have to work hard to get what she wants in life!", in different place, the rich man who waits the death, shorty saying this for you, "lucky, you are healthy!"

Simply Remember…

Healthy is wealthy. Healthy body is blessing you can’t count on. It’s very important because when you are strong, the stormy couldn't ruin you. Well, not only the healthy body actually, I think you also need to have healthy mind to make things positive and be thankful for everything.

Photo Credit: Favim

An Inspiring Story: “Dad, Why am I Different??“

"Ayah, Mengapa Aku Berbeda??” or "Dad, why am I different??" is one of most touching movie I ever seen. It’s an Indonesian best seller novel based on.

There was a man accompanies his wife for maternity process on hospital. That woman gave birth to beautiful baby girl after complicated maternity process which cause her died. The man was very deeply hurt, but he tried to be strong because his wife gave him a beautiful baby girl. He gave name "Angel" to the baby girl, similar with like his wife's name.

In age of three years old, the man realized there was something wrong with Angel. She didn't response to voice and even never said anything like normally three years old kid. She was very silent and passive. His dad and grandma brought her to doctor and they were very shocked founding their girl were dumb and deaf –not able to speak nor to listen.

His father and grandmother decided to buy her a hearing aid for dumb and deaf. Slowly, Angel responded to voice and learnt to say something. It was not easy for her, but her father did not give up. He was very happy that finally listen her first word from his daughter and saw her smile happy. He taught her playing piano to make his girl happy and more responsive to voice and music. Angel loved it. Day by day, piano is Angel's best friend. She always plays piano anytime at home.

When she grew up, her dad sent her to 'Sekolah Luar Biasa' or 'Dumb and Deaf School'. In that school she doesn't feel different because all of her friends were dumb and deaf too and they learnt how to communicate on their own way, also learnt science. After couple semester, her teacher advised her dad to send Angel to general school on Jakarta, because teacher thought Angel is very special and smart, eventhough she couldn’t speak and listen normally.

After long discussion, finally her dad and grandmother agreed bring her to general school on Jakarta. Jakarta is modern city on Indonesia. Comparing to her previous place, Jakarta will be more difficult for her to stay and associate with others. People will not as friendly as on her old place too. But her dad believes Angel will be able to pass it. The chief of school rejected Angel when she registered at the first time. Her dad convinced the chief to accept her couple of times. After examined Angel and saw her potential, the chief finally accepted her with agreement that Angel will be dropped out if she couldn't learn as well as normal student.

Great, Angel can study as well as normal student. At school, many students under estimated her and not often bullied her, attack her and hurt her. One moment, even group of friends injured her hands and fingers so that she couldn’t play piano for a while. She often cried for it, but it won't stop her. She also continued to play piano and even working part time as pianist at cafe.

One day, she joined to Pianist Festival Competition to play classic piano. She was doubt her self because she never play classic piano, but her music teacher told her that she can make it and willing to guide her. Challenge was accepted!

When she would go on stage, her enemy at school bullied her by smearing her face using lipstick and weird make up. Her face turned into the clown! She was looks so mess and dull and people laughed on her when she first appeared on stage. She cried, but show must go on. She played the classic piano with tears on her face and awkward make up. One two three.. Piano was played. She played it very well touching and hypnotizes people. People didn't care anymore with her awkward make up after she was successfully showing her talent through beautiful composition in the twang of piano. Audience stood up and clapped their hands. In the end, she won this festival!

*Message from This Story:

YOU CAN MAKE IT!

Yes, YOU CAN MAKE IT!

Whoever you are, you can make your dream comes true and jumps anywhere you want to. You have to believe in yourself. Don’t curse yourself for your weakness. Nobody’s perfect! Living in silence told Angel many things about life. She is same like all of us, but she may stronger in facing problem than anyone else.

*Photo Credit: 123rf(.)com

The Best of Eid Mubarak SMS Messages

“Look outside!

It’s so pleasant!

sun smiling For you,

trees dancing for you,

birds singing for you..

because I requested them all to wish You a Happy Eid Mubarak”

***

“Have a joyous Eid with full of sparkling lights.

A warm and heart felt wishes to tell you how much you mean to me.

Happy Eid Mubarak”

***

“On this festive occasion of Eid-Mubarak

I wish the warmth of our friendship

Always remains the same

Happy Eid Mubarak”

***

“May the angels protect you,

May the sadness forget u

…may u live in peace 4 ever.

Happy EID MUBARAK”

***

“As Allah waters His Creation,

May Healso sprinkle His wonderous blessings over you and your beloved.”

***

“May This EId Bring Many Happiness In Your Life, Bring Calm & Rest In Your Life.

Happy Eid Mubarak*

***

““Wish you happy Eid & happiness of this holy day,

May ALLAH shower HIS countless blessings on you and your family.”

****

““May the lights of this Eid lighten your whole life like shining sun.

May you be blessed by ALLAH every moment of this Day.”

***

“Accept my deep heart prayers for you successful life on this Happy Eid.

Wish you a “Eid Mubarak”.

***

““On This Blessed Eid, wish that Allah’s blessings light up the path and lead to happiness, peace and success.”

***

“Wish you a Very Happy Eid and may this Eid bring abundant joy and happiness in your life!”

***

“You are special,

you are unique,

May your This Eid be also as special and unique as you are..”

***

“I wish you the gift of faith, the blessing of hope and the peace of his love at Eid and always.”

***

“May the Joy, Cheer, Mirth and Merriment of this Eid surround you forever.”

***

“May you find success in all your endeavors, May Allah blessings be always with you.

Happy Eid Mubarak”

***

 ***

Reference: Eid Mubarak SMS Messages and Maza Point

Do NOT Ever Doubt Yourself!

“Do not ever doubt yourself. You will lose”

_{( Nora Profit- The Writer )}

Nora Profit feels regret that she had wasting her precious years time because of her frightened. One day, after watching the show of Salome Bey, she decided to write about the carrier story of Salome Bey to promote about her at once. She pulled her brave and called Salome, pretending as the Essence magazine reporter. Salome agreed and finally both met for an interview. Nora realized she was lying, but she was very happy because finally she had chance to write an article and sent it to Essence, one of big national magazine for the first time. She wrote it out carefully, tried to reedit couple times to get the best of her and make sure it’s worthy to read.

After she sent the articles through mail, she suddenly realized it was a mistake. She didn’t ever write any article. It was easy to lying on Salome, but pretended to write for Essence was disaster. She said her self that few weeks or few months, she would get the replied letter saying her article was the worst ever.

Three weeks later, she received the reply. Her manuscript returned to her address, with an envelope with her own handwriting. “It’s humiliation. How stupid me! How could I involve myself in the world of authorship and compete with professional writer?”, said her. She didn’t open the envelope, she was too afraid reading the rejection letter. She throw the envelope away to her cupboard.

Five years later, she prepared her self to move to Sacramento. She cleaned the appartement and she surprised founding letter addressed to her address with her own handwriting. “What letter is it? Why I send letter for my self”. She opened the letter, she find a piece of paper wrote by the editor:

Dear Nora Profit,Your story about Salome Bey is very remarkable. We need additional quotes. Please add that quotation and immediately returned this article. We would like to publish your story in the next edition

She was very shock about it. It took quite long time to get up from that shock. She lost at least $500 and opportunity to see her articles appear in big magazine. The most important thing, her frightened makes her lost years living to be the productive writer, her favorite work. When she remembered this incident she gets the important lesson: “Do not ever doubt yourself. You will lose!”

*From my post on Bubblews “Quotes of The Day #4: “Do not Ever Doubt Yourself!””  

Photo Credit: wired(.)co(.)uk

Loveless

It's way too late to say I love you!

my fear is paying off!

I lose you..

I lose you...

for my entire life

I'm the most stupid person ever!

My shadow haunts me everyday for this mistake

I let you go easily..

I give that b*tch chance to get closer to you..

and 'good bye' was your last words I heard on that day

You've waited me for quite long time,

but I was too scare to move..

I love you, but I couldn't get you..

She were between us..

trying to get your attention and sending me to this broken bridge

Noooo.. she won the war!

I regret it..

you might think I never tried!

YES.. such a big mistake for me..!

I let you go easily..

and it's hurting me now...

I still wish we could be together again..

but after this long time..

why it seems like you've changed?

you praise her and start loving her?

does she really love you?

does she give her best to you?

I have doubt…

you stare at me and smile,

softly you whisper to me, "yes, she does and I love her so much"

I’m breathless…

*Photo Credit: sandeep99980(.)blogspot(.)com & loveizlyf(.)blogspot(.)com